New Blog

I started a Pregnancy Blog, A Little Brownie, so that family, friends, and nesties could journey with me through pregnancy. The link is over on the left side.

Baby Blessing Received

Last Friday I found out that we did not have any infertility benefits. It was a hard pill to swallow b/c we were coming up on the end of our 12th cycle. I cried a lot and prayed a lot. I felt His comfort as I started to give up. I started to think it wasn't going to happen for us, not without help. I couldn't understand why He had not answered our prayers.

I did not know his plan for us, but it seems so clear looking at it now. We bought our house shortly after we started looking which gave us the room we needed for a child. We got everything moved in and most of everything unpacked. Everything was in place. Then.....
God answered our prayers. He blessed us. We got our BFP on Wednesday 11/5. I cried many joyful tears. I was shaky and in disbelief. I didn't doubt the dollar tree test but I wanted to see what a positive FRER looked like so I went and bought one of those and a CBE digital. I saw the two pink lines and they were just as wonderful as I imagined. Seeing the word "Pregnant" made it feel real. I/we are so incredibly thankful and excited!!

Thank you to all of you who have been supportive over the last year. Your words of encouragement and prayers mean the world to me. I couldn't have gone through this without you! I'm still praying for you!! I hope you'll continue on the next journey with me too! Our first dr's appointment is Monday 11/17 so we'll go from there.

Love,
Jeannie

It's been a while

Seems like it's been forever since I bothered to check the blogs, let alone write.
I feel like I'm still playing catch up from all the craziness over the last couple of weeks. Work lost power which means we were set back and we're still trying to catch up. I was getting everything ready for my first jewelry party. My great aunt died last week. We're closing on our house tomorrow. I'm very excited. We're going to paint this weekend and hopefully slowly start to move in. We made our first new home purchase last night. A new tv for the bedroom. We're very excited.

For the first time in 3 months, I confirmed O today. I'm 3dpo. It feels great to know where I stand in my cycle. We're very hopeful that cycle 11 will end with a pregnancy.

Time to start packing :)

Crazy couple of days

So sadly, Friday morning AF showed up. At least I think it was Friday. I don't have my calendar in front of me. Regardless, this cycle did not end with a baby surprise. At first I was very sad, but I'm on to a new cycle now so there's hope again. To try and make sense of it all, I just told myself trying to move into a new house while pregnant would not be good. I love to paint and wouldn't be able to participate in that so it works out okay. We'll be in the new house before testing time again so at least we'll be settled. I can't change the outcome so there's no reason to dwell on it at this point.
Sunday, Ike blew us away. I had no idea that we would get hit by a windstorm from Hurricane Ike, but oh boy we did. I left for church Sunday thinking, it's windy out here. Walking from the parking lot into church, I thought my earrings were going to rip right through my ears. I left church and realized something crazy was going on. On the way home, there were trees down everywhere, blocking main roadways and power was out in several places. I-71 had a trampoline on it that had blown over from a nearby neighborhood. That was crazy to see. I could barely get through our neighborhood b/c of all the down tress, but once I got home, we didn't have power. So what did we do?? We went furniture shopping. We had to drive across town to find a store with power, but we had nothing else to do. Our power came back on Sunday night, but it wasn't until this morning that we got internet and cable back. Work is out of power. Of course, I didn't even think to call until I pulled up and saw that it was dark. A few of us showed up so we just called patients to tell them we would be closed until the power came back on and then I went to hang out with my cousin and her kids who are out of school until the power comes back on. This morning, I got up and got ready b/c our supervisor said plan to come in unless she called. Of course, I got no call so I threw on some jeans and a sweatshirt and called her myself. She said to stay home for now and she'll call later. Either today or tomorrow I'll go in and do some chart audits for a few hours, but it won't be a whole day of work. I don't mind that, but just tell me if I need to stay home and expect to come in or if I have the day off and expect to come in tomorrow. I have things I could be doing other than waiting to hear from work. Oh well, at least we have power.

Is it over?

CD 28, BFN, no cramps. UGH! I thought I was starting to cramp a little this morning but the moment I felt it, it was gone and has not returned. I guess Af will show up tomorrow, as it has the last two months, CD 29 turning into CD 1. I will temp this next cycle. I will confirm O and know where I am in my cycle. I just want my cycle to end with a positive test. I kind of feel numb about it all. No more hope even though AF hasn't shown and no more disappointment.

So Excited!!!

I am so excited. Right now, James and I live in a house he bought before we were married. I helped pick paint colors and some of the decor, but I wasn't involved in the house buying process. Tonight, we made an offer on a house that we both picked out and love! I'm sure they will counter-offer b/c we kind of lowballed, but I'm hoping that within the next week or so, we'll be doing the home inspection. The house seems to be in fantastic shape, it's only 9 years, but we've not found a single issue. Everything we went to do is cosmetic. What a blessing that we are able to take this step up. Here's just a few pictures of the house.



we call it the U of L basement b/c of the red and black stripes, which we love!

Praise You in this Storm

I was driving home from my sister's house tonight after watching U of L play like crap and was listening to a Casting Crowns cd. I was just "jamming" along and the song "Praise You in this Storm" came on. The music in the song is so powerful that it gives me chills every time I listen to it. Today, the words brought tears to my eyes. It often does when I haven't listened to it in a while, but today, it just hit home in a new way. As we are approaching the end of cycle 10, we don't know if yet again it will end in disappointment and bring along with it all the questions of why or if it will actually end with a positive test telling us we're pregnant. The end of cycle 10 is extremely close to cycle 12 which means 1 year of trying to get pregnant with no success. That is frightening and heartbreaking. This runs through my head all the time. Now that I'm anticipating the end of my cycle within the week, the I might be pregnant b/c of that symptom is starting. I'm trying very hard not to focus on that (and with us looking at new homes it's easier than expected). Those thoughts still cross my mind throughout the day. This is my struggle. This is my storm. My heart is torn b/c I trust in Him and have faith we'll have our own child, but it may not be His will. The song's in my playlist but here are the words.

Praise You In This Storm lyrics

I was sure by now
That You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry
You raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth

I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm